*I am using an example of kids 'playing' but this also applies for older kids or adults.
Often, play can look great on the outside.
- Two kids are talking.
- They are laughing.
- They are doing something near each other.
- That is a good start.
But if you slow down and take a closer look, you might notice something important.
You want to dig deeper by asking:
Are they truly interacting with each other, which means one person is affecting the other and vice versa, OR is it more about two one-way interactions?
Leveling up in play means moving from two one-way interactions to multiple integrated interactions.
In my social groups, I don’t tell the kids to “be more interactive.” That means nothing to them. And even if they understood what I meant, it would not give them a roadmap on how to achieve it.
So I give them small challenges, phrased like this:
-
How can you combine your ideas into one new idea?
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Make group decisions together. Even my 4-year-old groups now know what this means and have been practicing it. I can talk more about this in a future newsletter.
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Can you change one rule about the game together before you start?
When the play levels up, the friendships usually follow.
NORIKO'S NOTES: sharing my life's simple joysđź’ś
Some of you know I spent the last two weekends visiting my son in San Diego. We were there for different reasons and it is always fun to visit with him. One special thing I did for myself: I drove by my old school where I worked as a school social worker. Rolando Elementary School in La Mesa-Spring Valley School District. I actually worked at two different schools but I have to admit, this was my favorite. What made it a special place to work was, of course, the people. I worked closely with the principal and we were a great team. I was new out of graduate school and loved every moment I spent learning from the staff and the students. I used to run small group sessions (a bit like the groups I run now at SCLC), taught classroom social and emotional lessons, and was involved in various crisis situations that came up for the whole school. It was nice to go back to where I started.
Thank you for letting me share my simple joyđź’ś.
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Instagram/Facebook/LinkedIn: @NorikoAbenojar
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Noriko Abenojar, MSW PPS
Parenting REdefined
Social and Cognitive Learning Center
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