I’ve been talking to many children, teens, and their parents. In the past few weeks, and the same challenge keeps coming up:
The shift from structured school days to wide-open summer hours often means… excessive screen time.
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Many of us are guilty of this too as an adult. Many have fallen into the continuous scroll. Especially for kids and teens, when everyday starts to blur together, it’s no surprise that emotions run high, overall motivation for less preferred tasks run low, and the desire to leave what they are doing in order to get back on that screen is at the ultimate high.
I’ve had many children tell me that while they are doing a non-screen activity, they can't wait to be done so they can go home to get on that screen. I’ve had kids say they would rather skip their family vacation if that meant time away from media. *please note: I do know that for some families, use of electronics for their child is a necessary part of their daily lives and I do not mean that must be disrupted.
Socially speaking, many kids begin to view an actual get together to be a bothersome task because it requires planning and execution of that plan. Why go through all of that work when they can get an immediate dopamine hit via a video game or YouTube video?? With this decreased motivation comes decreased exposure to social interactions, leading to decreased social confidence. It is a lose-lose situation.
I’ve been guiding families to use a simple guideline.
REMEMBER: SIMPLE DOES NOT MEAN EASY.
It still requires a lot of thoughtful planning and accountability from both sides. It isn’t meant to control your child’s entire day but to bring back a sense of purpose and balance to the summer.
GOAL: DEVELOP WELL-ROUNDED SUMMER DAYS
Each day, make sure that 3 of the 5 categories are being met.
We are not going for perfection, we are going for a simple way to make sure your child is having opportunities to expand their lives while school is out.
Here are the 5 categories, not in order of importance:
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Creative
-
Physical
-
Contribution
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Executive Functioning
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Social
🎨 1. Do Something Creative
This helps with self-expression, emotional processing, and independent thinking.
- Drawing, painting, writing, or journaling
- Baking or cooking from scratch
- Filming and editing short videos or animations *with caution because this if in front of a screen
- Building with LEGOs or wood, designing mini-games
🏃 2. Do Something Physical
Movement is essential for energy regulation, focus, and mood stability.
- Walking the dog, walking someone else's dog
- Practicing yoga or stretching
- Going on a bike ride
- Doing a home workout using body weight
🏠 3. Contribute to the Family
A child’s sense of value and belonging increases when they contribute, not just consume.
- Helping prep dinner or do the dishes
- Organizing a shared space like the pantry or entryway
- Picking one common area at a time to clean
- Grocery shopping with a parent
- Bathe or groom the pet
🧠 4. Use Executive Functioning
These tasks boost planning, organization, and follow-through—skills that matter for independence.
- Making a packing list for an upcoming trip
- Planning a grocery list
- Reorganizing a shared zone for smoother routines (like a shoe bin or backpack hook)
- Coordinating a sleepover or hangout with friends (initiate, plan, follow up!)
🗣️ 5. Connect Socially
Summer is a great time to build real-world social confidence—even in small steps.
- Learning a peer’s name at camp
- Texting a friend to meet up
- Organizing a game night or movie day with friends, neighbors, or cousins
- Writing a note or email to a relative
Why This Matters
This isn’t about eliminating screen time if your family allows it. It’s about anchoring each day with meaningful effort in a few key areas and having a guideline to make sure each day is productive in some way.
Your child can still enjoy downtime. They can still use devices, according to your rules.
If you allow screen time,
***MAKE YOUR ELECTRONIC USE RULES VERY CLEAR***
Having rules that are not clear or is ever changing is setting yourselves up for constant arguments and nobody wants that!
✅ Accomplishing 3 out of 5 categories a day can create a huge shift in your child’s emotional regulation, skills acquisitions, overall confidence, and sense of purpose this summer.
✅ And maybe, by the end of summer, they’ll surprise themselves with how much they’ve built, connected, and contributed.
NORIKO'S NOTES: sharing my life's simple joys💜
Thank you for those who sent me graduation pictures of your kiddo! I loved seeing them. Please keep them coming!!
🚗🚙🚐🚗🚙🚐🚗🚙🚐🚗🚙🚐🚗🚙🚐🚗🚙🚐🚗🚙🚐
Today's note is my deep gratitude for parents who drive their kids to see me from outside of Davis. Many families come from far away, driving over an hour each way, every single week.
Last weekend, I had a new found appreciation for those coming from east of Davis as I drove through the everlasting "FIX HWY-50" construction zone. At the start of this project, I would say it was just more annoying than anything else. Now, major changes are happening that split up the freeway in different directions, the need to exit to go around blocked sections, adding so much to the driving time. I had no idea how much work was being done!!! I typically go towards the bay area and not towards Sacramento. As we drove through, I realized how much my SCLC parents have had to endure to bring their child to see me. So today, I want to shout out loud:
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL OF YOUR DRIVING TIME AND EFFORTS TO MAKE IT TO EVERY SESSION!!! I appreciate you so much.
I was driving towards Sacramento because we went on a white water rafting trip to celebrate Father's Day. This was my second time on this same route and we had so much fun!! I am now ready for a harder level next time 🌊
⬆️Photo of our boat
Me: I'm having the time of my life but my eyes are closed 😆
Emma: Looking calm and collected posing for the photographer as the boat is halfway in the water, perfectly in her 18 year old fashion 🤣
⬆️Also our boat : Our amazing guide gave us a great ride!
I hope all of the dad's had a great father's day!
Thank you for letting me share my simple joy💜.
Please Help Spread the Word!
The more awareness we bring to the importance of social skills development, the more schools and workplaces will recognize the importance of inclusivity and the need for meaningful social support.
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