A small change that helps everyone stay calm when emotions run high.
In October, we are talking about the small changes that bring big impact.
Today’s focus: SLOW YOUR WORDS TO CALM THE MOMENT
When emotions rise, so does the pace.
Voices get faster.
A small change that helps everyone stay calm when emotions run higher. Words overlap. Everyone reacts instead of thinking.
It starts to feel like a runaway train that no one can stop.
When you intentionally slow your words, you bring the interaction back to a grounded pace.
It’s not about being quiet or soft. It’s about staying steady so everyone else can steady too.
Why Slowing Down Helps
When we slow our speech, we don’t just model calm for our kids.
We also give ourselves the time to think before reacting.
A slower pace lets both sides of the conversation breathe and recover.
It turns a reactive moment into a teachable and trust building experience.
- Changes the energy in the room. Your calm tone helps others calm too.
- Gives children more time to process and think.
- Signals safety. A slower pace tells the brain there is no emergency.
- Creates more time for you to think and respond, not react.
Try This Small Shift
When things start to feel fast or tense:
- Lower your volume.
- Slow your speech.
- Pause between sentences.
Notice what happens next.
Kids often lean in, listen more closely, and match your rhythm.
When you combine this week’s idea of slowing your speech with last week’s focus on using fewer prompts, you give yourself the best chance to guide the moment calmly and clearly.
My own kids used to joke that they knew mommy was serious when I started to talk extra slowly. 😄
📬 Missed last week’s article on Why Prompting Less Helps Kids Learn More? [Read it here]
NORIKO'S NOTES: sharing my life's simple joys💜
I THINK I made a big discovery today. I have been frustrated that my hamstrings are very tight no matter how much I stretch it. The rest of my body is actually pretty flexible. I am working on my flexibility to prevent injuries. I read today that it actually might be my sciatic nerve that is tight, not my hamstrings and there are specific ways I can "glide the nerve(?)" to loosen it up? I did some test movements that seem to confirm it is the nerve. I'm so excited about this. I know some of you are physical therapists or health and fitness professionals. Can you tell me if I'm on the right track?
This was my deep dive of the weekend 😄.
⬆️me at In-Shape Fitness
Thank you for letting me share my simple joy💜.
🌟Want more support and real-world tools?
Join the Parenting REdefined Membership
Get live group coaching, practical strategies, and a supportive community of parents who understand the ups and downs of raising kids with social and emotional challenges.
👉 Read More Info on Parenting REdefined Membership
🎥 Masterclasses for Parents
Learn at your own pace with my on-demand video classes.
Free Masterclass: The Abenojar Social Growth & Mastery Framework™ — understand how social skills develop and how to support your child’s growth.
Paid Masterclass: The Friendship Navigator — practical visual tools to help your child build real, lasting friendships.
💌 Read More Parenting REdefined Newsletters
Catch up on recent topics that help parents support their child’s social and emotional growth.
Noriko Abenojar, MSW PPS
Parenting REdefined
Social and Cognitive Learning Center
Responses