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➡️Keep reading even more for: NORIKO’S NOTES: sharing my life’s simple joys 💜
I Call It “Sharing Airtime”
One phrase I use often with kids is:
“It doesn’t have to be exactly the same, but the time you spend talking should be similar to the time I spend talking.”
That’s what I call sharing airtime—and it’s a tough concept to grasp if you can’t see it.
So here’s one way to help kids experience this balance in a visual and tactile way, while being playful.
🧱 The LEGO Talk-and-Build Game
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Give each person different color LEGO bricks
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Place a baseplate or flat surface in the middle.
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Every time someone takes a turn speaking (a sentence, a thought, or a full response), they add one brick of their color to the shared structure.
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Keep the conversation going for a few minutes—favorite snacks, video games, or weekend plans work great.
Then stop and take a look.
👀 What colors do you see?
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If the structure is mostly one color, one person may have dominated the conversation.
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If the colors are more balanced, it likely means turn-taking was too.
This activity isn’t about perfection or shame—it’s about awareness.
Kids get to see what a balanced conversation looks like. That kind of visual feedback helps them grow, without anyone needing a lecture.
You can even pause and reflect:
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“Who had the most bricks?”
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“How could we make it more even next time?”
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“Was anyone waiting a long time to speak?”
It’s a simple exercise—but it builds:
✅ Conversation rhythm
✅ Social thinking
✅ Teamwork
All by holding the skill literally in their hands.
IN REAL LIFE:
With or without this lego activity, sometimes there will be one person who is sharing more because they are experiencing challenges or they are sharing something super exciting...and the conversation is a bit more unbalanced. I point out to kids that sometimes, this is great and needed. This may be exactly what we should be doing to show support to our friends.
HOWEVER, in order to learn this 'exception', it is important to learn the rules first. The rules, although at first may feel uncomfortable and rigid to teach, build the foundation. Once that foundation is mastered, it is time to level up and teach the exceptions to the rules and it will feel natural for everyone.
IMPORTANT NOTE FROM NORIKO :
I am sharing a lot of tricks and strategies through my newsletters. This isn't meant for you to feel stressed or feel you need to implement everything I share.
That is not my goal for the newsletters and that would be an unrealistic expectation for you to have for yourself.
Please use this as a data bank that you can refer back to when you are ready or when you are curious.
What I do want you to get from each newsletter is THE WAY YOU APPROACH SOCIAL SKILLS DEVELOPMENT.
Any skill that your child is struggling through will have 2-10 mini steps that are more achievable leading up to that big skill. I'd love for you to start seeing everything from that lens...it will be good both for you and your child.
NORIKO'S NOTES: sharing my life's simple joys💜
I recently became the community advisor to a new UC Davis student club named Project MindConnect. In its first year, this club has grown to almost 50 students!! They have come together to learn about social skills coaching/development and committed to offering social and educational workshop for SCLC families! They dedicate hours from their busy student lives to join me to learn each week. I wanted to give you heads up that they are planning more fun events in May! I just had a meeting with the whole group and the workshops are going to be amazing!
I hope you will join me. I will be sure to share the details when they are available, as well as their fundraising events!!
I am sooooo honored to be a part of this group.
You can find more info at projectmindconnect_ucd on Instagram
Click Here for Project MindConnect
Thank you for letting me share my simple joy💜 .
Gratefully yours,
Noriko
ONLINE MASTERCLASSES NOW OPEN:
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The more awareness we bring to the importance of social skills development, the more schools and workplaces will recognize the importance of inclusivity and the need for meaningful social support.
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Noriko Abenojar, MSW PPS
Parenting REdefined
www.NorikoAbenojar.com
www.SocialAndCognitiveLearningCenter.com
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